Change and Pollen are in the Air

I think it's inevitable, when you've been in or working in education for as long as I have to feel a little good anxious this time of year. It's graduation time. A time when many milestones are reached, grades come back, and change is in the air. Two years ago, I was excited to graduate, but also anxious about finding a job. Now, I'm anxious for my students and so incredibly proud of all that they have accomplished this year.

I am proud of many of my law student friends graduating this year too. Come Friday, Mike will officially be in the Navy. I can't believe it. After all that it took to get him to this point.....I hope I don't cry at the ceremony. (I likely will.) We have so many celebrations planned for this weekend and I'm trying to talk Mike into taking every advantage of the celebrations before the hard work of Bar study begins. 

Change is coming to my life too....indirectly and directly. I'm planning on moving to a new apartment at the beginning of July. It is less expensive and more room and, even though my commute will be a little bit longer, it will definitely be worth the transition. I'm also starting a part-time nannying gig today that will easily work with my flexible job schedule. Clearly, I like to stay busy. 

While I'll miss the short Spring we're having, I'm so excited for the summer. There is a wedding I'm going to be in, a trip to the beach planned, a move, and I'm sure there will be many more celebrations when Mike is done with the bar! 

It has been a great semester and here are some pictures of some recent adventures/trips:

Ben Folds concert.

MJ and Baby Ashton.

Smiles:)

Loving his hat.

And then pictures from Longwood Gardens....

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Forget-Me-Nots

Wisteria, I believe...

After we were caught in a downpour...

Leaning Into Joy

Ever since I finished Brene Brown's book "The Gifts of Imperfection", I couldn't wait to read her follow-up book "Daring Greatly". Brene approaches things we all deal with in our lives (like shame and vulnerability) from a perspective that is simultaneously academic and down-to-earth. I bought the audiobook so that I could listen to it in the car and, until I'm finished with it, there might be a few blog posts on things that really resonate with me. 

"Having spent several years studying what it means to feel joyful, I’d argue that joy is probably the most difficult emotion to really feel." - Brene Brown

You would think joy would be one of the easier emotions to feel compared to the less-than-desirables out there, but joy can leave us feeling vulnerable. Brene gives the example of putting her children to bed at night and being overwhelmed with love for them and fear for if she ever lost them. We know that life is often outside of our control and sometimes trying to prepare ourselves for the worst can keep us from experiencing joy in the moment.

For me, I can think of two examples in which I haven't been letting myself feel joy fully. 

1) I absolutely love my new job. Because my last job was not a healthy work environment, I often get afraid of feeling extreme joy with my current work situation because I just didn't believe I was capable of experiencing this and now I'm afraid of it being an illusion.

2) Mike getting back into JAG. Both of us have struggles with actually feeling the joy associated with Mike actually getting through the medical clearance process with JAG. We were so happy at the beginning of this whole process and then became jaded by the obstacles that kept arising in his path. Now that things finally seem official (he is commissioning on May 16th!), we're still afraid to feel TOO happy about everything, lest this all be some joke.

"We’re trying to beat vulnerability to the punch. We don’t want to be blindsided by hurt. We don’t want to be caught off-guard, so we literally practice being devastated or never move from self-elected disappointment." - Brene Brown

The sad thing is....we can never keep ourselves from being hurt or being vulnerable. Even if we control absolutely everything about a situation....perfectly. And protecting ourselves from future disappointment by not feeling joy does not make future disappointments hurt any less. It is also robbing us of our time in the present! I know that practicing joy and gratitude in the moment (and not worrying about if or when things will change) is something that I need to work on.

“I used to think that the best way to go through life was to expect the worst. That way, if it happened, you were prepared, and if it didn’t happen, you were pleasantly surprised. Then I was in a car accident and my wife was killed. Needless to say, expecting the worst didn’t prepare me at all. And worse, I still grieve for all of those wonderful moments we shared that I didn’t fully enjoy.” -a story a man told Brene that she retold in Daring Greatly

I am really happy in my job. I did not actually believe it was possible to enjoy working full-time this much and I did not think it was possible to feel this fulfilled in my work outside of the clinical mental health counseling. My coworkers are amazing, wonderful women who inspire me to be a better professional every day.....AND they're super cool. I feel incredibly blessed to be a part of that team.

I am ecstatic about Mike's upcoming Navy JAG commissioning and I'm so proud of his resilient attitude throughout this entire process. I'm just unbelievably excited for him. He figured out what he wanted to do and set his heart and sights on it. I'm pretty sure if I found out that the thing I'd set my heart on doing had a 4% acceptance rate, I would have adjusted my heart and expectations to something a little less risky. But Mike pursued it wholeheartedly even throughout every moment in the past year in which someone told him it was no longer an option. 

What are you grateful for in your life? Is there anything you're afraid of that is keeping you from experiencing joy fully?

Note: I got my "Daring Greatly" book quotes from this other blog post on the same topic. It's also worth a read!

Things That Have Happened

• The Cherry Blossoms Bloomed! Mike's grandparents visited and we were motivated by their visit to go down and see the cherry blossom trees on the weekend of their peak bloom. It was one of the most crowded days at the Mall that I've ever seen.

Blossoms!

Thomas Jefferson Memorial.

Washington Monument across the Tidal Basin.

WWII Memorial.

• Mike had a birthday! And it happened to fall during show week of the Spring GGSS production of Iolanthe!

A coconut cake from Mike's grandmother. 

I love this face! This is the face Mike made when I insisted on some lighting of the candles and singing of Happy Birthday:)

27 years old!

Singing "Let it Go" fro Frozen was easily the highlight of the night for me, but I believe this was when Mike was singing Phantom which is more his element.

These are my favorite boys:)

• I went home to see Ashton and my sister Kim before she left for Oregon to take on a new Americorps position. Ashton has recently learned how to laugh so in this picture I was trying to make him laugh for the camera.

His shirt says "Mister Sunshine"!!

• I went on a work trip to visit a college with some high school students to St. Mary's College. Our students can't often afford to go on these trips by themselves (their parents can't get off work to take them, etc.) so it was a really good opportunity for them to get a taste of college life. In fact, the trip got me a little nostalgic for my college years.

Mural from an art student at St. Mary's.

Garden art.

It had been storming all day, but the weather ended up being beautiful even with the clouds.

And this is what I saw on my way metro-ing home. Someone was clearly just done with the weather.

• I cooked new things! This is leftover steak from Medium Rare with sundried tomatoes, feta, and spinach. It was delicious. I also made taco salads using this recipe.

•  I got my hair cut! It is shorter than I had expected, but will be nice for the hot DC summer ahead.

• Mike heard some good news about Navy JAG! You can read more about it on his blog (once he is able to post about it), but basically JAG is now a "go" again....and it had seemed on several occasions that there was absolutely no way it would work out. We had coped with the stress in severals ways and also celebrated the good news in several ways. One of those celebratory times was cupcakes:)

Cupcakes from The Sweet Lobby. Boston Cream and Red Velvet. red Velvet was THE best.

• We traveled to NYC on Easter Weekend for a friend's birthday.

On the bus trip there:) In the 2nd picture, the boys are upset I am making them take more than one picture.

DC to NY!

Saturday night we had some of the BEST Indian food I've ever had. Garlic naan, chicken tikka masala,  curried goat. There was absolutely no chicken tikka masala sauce even left.

On Easter Sunday, we went to church with one of Goo's friends, Nehemiah. Goo was the birthday girl that weekend. Everyone sang in the choir except me, because hymns are very complicated and I wanted to enjoy from the congregation.

After church, we visited Goo's old college, Sarah Lawrence, and it was so picturesque that I wanted a picture. 

Brunch on Easter Sunday. There was only bottomless champagne instead of mimosas. Apparently NYC just gets straight to the point.

My Easter bunny ring that I'd gotten the night before with some free cupcakes from our hotel. Our waitress complimented me on it.

• We saw Henry the IVth: Part I with Josh and Ross! We got dinner at District of Pi pizza beforehand where I had the best kale salad I've ever tasted and excellent deep dish pizza. 

Mike and I and Ross photobombing.

• I got an Ashton of the Day picture with the cutest cheeks and feet that I've ever seen. I just had to share:)

This week, we have a Ben Folds concert Monday night to look forward to (my birthday present to Mike), Henry Part 2 on Wednesday night, and a trip to my home on Saturday for my mom's 50th birthday.

Lately: Spring

I've been horrible at blogging lately, but I wanted to share some pictures of recent (past couple of months) events that I want to remember.

Georgetown 10 Miler:

One of my friends and I were set to run a ten-miler right before the Disney trip, but she ended up hurting her back and, thus, Mike seemed fine taking her place. Mike has always managed to be faster than me without training so I thought nothing of it. However, due to the horrid winter (no opportunity to train) and winter weather right before the race (the course was literally covered with ice on the 1st half and slush/mud on the 2nd half), we both struggled a little more than anticipated. Luckily, we had an awesome playlist and had fun running together. The soreness lasted through a lot of the Disney trip so we never felt guilty about all of he food we were eating:)

Crucial playlist for the race that we synced together.

Pre-race picture.

Our shoes post-race.

StitchFix: 

I got a Stitchfix for the first time during March because I'd read a lot about them and wanted to see what the hype was about. You fill out a styling questionnaire, get a personalized box of clothes picked out for you, and then the $20.00 you initially paid goes toward the clothes you keep. You can try them on for 3 days at home and then return what you don't want to keep. Pros: 1) I loved all of the clothes I was sent. 2) I got to try them on with stuff I owned. 3) It helps if you're stuck in a fashion rut. Example: I always buy dresses, but have a hard time buying casual shirts for myself. Cons: They are designer clothes so a little pricier than what I would normally pay. 2) If you don't like anything in your fix, then you're out of $20.00 It's non-refundable.

Here are the clothes I got. I kept the pink and navy polka dot top. I won't be getting another fix because I prefer thrift stores and Target to designer clothes, but it is nice for every once-in-a-while.

Extremely soft blazer/cardigan.

Tribal print tank top.

Outfit styling cards.

Zig Zag black and white skirt.

If anyone is interested in trying a StitchFix, if you use this link, I would get a credit on my account toward a future fix.

Baltimore Adventures:

Mike and I spent a day at the aquarium in Baltimore with Jessie and her fiancee, Duncan. The weather was actually lovely to hang around the harbor and eat gelato. Then they made us homemade pizza and salad for dinner.

Inner Harbor and Dragonboats.

Mike inside a megaladon shark's mouth.

Homemade dinner!

Pineapple Upside Down Cake:

Somehow we ended up with a pineapple at our disposal and I decided on a whim to make this pineapple upside down cake. I really wish I had some pictures of it, but it wasn't super pretty and it really was gone in 3 days. It was delicious and definitely something I'll be making again! Thanks to Mike for cutting up the pineapple!

http://smittenkitchen.com/blog/2007/05/the-sunny-day-yawn/


Lately:

Happy Hour with my coworkers at 100 Montaditos where their small sandwiches are only $1.00 on Wednesdays and wine is $3.00, I believe! I kind of want to go there every Wednesday now.

I went to church with Kelly this past Sunday where Alex (her boyfriend and my friend) plays keyboard in the church band. It's a super cool church and they preached on forgiveness and grace which always speaks to my heart. 

My attempt at a selfie before I went to help out Noah with a mock trial presentation. I was a witness. Anything to practice my public speaking.

Coming up: "Iolanthe" (the GGSS spring production) is going up this week and I am helping out backstage where I can. Apparently, the cherry blossoms are also going to peak this week! Brian and Kay are likely visiting from Philadelphia this weekend. And it's Mike's birthday on Friday! He is very busy this week (just got back from Puerto Rico where his mock trial team placed 3rd/4th in the competition) so we will probably actually celebrate next weekend when we have a brief stay in NYC planned. However, he knows I will make sure that they sing happy birthday to him at the Friday cast party.

How is it already April? I also have my 90-day review for work this week and it's so hard for me to believe I've been working my 'new' job for 90 days....probably because, with all of the snow days, it actually does fall quite short of 90. But still! Next month Mike graduates from law school! My mom also turns 50 and I'll be going home for a pool party at our house so hopefully it will be warmer by then. So much to look forward to. At least this 'busy' is a 'good busy' season.